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The Narcissist’s Perception of Your Relationship



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Music by Alan Walker, provided by No Copyright Sounds

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27 Comments

  • Alexandra C.

    Thanks for the video..so true. This is a little off topic but I have an idea for a video….how victims deal with having to become defenders to the nonsense that goes on. We ultimately sometimes end up pinholed especially when they smear us professionally – to raise the issue with the company because it's US or THEM. We are left in positions where we either defend ourselves and tell the TRUTH of what happened OR we risk our professional reputations being TOTALLY DESTROYED though they are already after all this…leaving us as victims feeling like the narcissists. We aren't – but having to defend ourselves means war at times and i'm wondering how you feel about our karma in this regard. i'm beginning to think sometimes their karma is their victims..they run into that victim who will NOT allow them to completely shatter our entire life which then means we are forced to speak up and then they reap consequence…..but then the victim feels like they may get bad karma for simply defending themselves as the TRUE victim. I've had to expose 3 of them at work now due to their inability to let me walk in peace..they dont let you. You try and leave quietly..they cause you more harm. You then have no choice but to expose them if you want any chance of salvaging your own reputation enough to move on.

  • Willa Barnes

    I have done a lot of healing due to these videos . Thank You David ! David you have helped so many people. 🙂
    I'm done being a doormat! I'm done dealing with ungrateful , selfish people. I spot them earlier now and cut them OUT of my life to preserve my sanity.

  • Garima Heath

    Yes they were both the victims and the heroes, both married with 2 kids, they destroyed 2 families. Both justifying their behaviors and abandonment of their kids and spouses with no explanations.But for each other they acted with the BS excuses that they told each other :

    They are both So IN LOVE , THEY ARE MEANT TO BE, THEY HAD SUCH AMAZING MOMENTS TOGETHER. They just can’t help this love they feel.
    Because it’s so amazing no matter who it hurts including 4 kids, because they deserve it, and they are just so avant-garde with society’s rules , marriage is just a piece of paper, only their feelings matter, no one else’s, she doesn’t care how they punish her because her only crime is love, love, love.

    They don’t know the meaning of love, or loyalty, or honesty, or fairness, or accountability.

    I know the exact words they used because I read their texts to each other. Emotional 😭 children – exactly.

    She gave him ultimatums after ultimatums that she would « leave him » if he didn’t leave « that monster your wife » and our children…. he responded with suicide threats of driving into walls to prove to her how much he loved her.
    And then blaming me because I will make it hell for him to leave – I am the bad guy. And he just doesn’t know , and no one will support him and his parents will not approve.

    She coached him to say the exact sentence over and over to leave me – I am not in love with you and i don’t want to be married to you. He rehearsed for 4 hours – i saw him doing it. Then he came to put on his performance, tried to squeeze out tears 😭, repeated that sentence over and over like an automaton. I asked him if he was just repeating her words. He had that “uh-oh she’s on to me” panicked look.

  • J Strada

    Hi David to me its sick that these narcs can fake it like they care and love you then turn around and hurt you in the worse possible way without out a care like your just a piece of trash I just found out that my ex narc brother inlaw who cheated on my sister who doesn't take care of his current kids my niece and 2 nephews has his girlfriend 3 months pregnant and I heard it from my niece really your gonna bring another kid into this world to suffer and to me his girlfriend is nuts for getting knocked up by a dude who doesn't want to be a father to his own kids it makes me sick seeing all these narcs around me treat there kids like crap I really sympathize with all the kids thats why I've always tried to be a loving and supportive aunt someone gotta have there back

  • Deanna Polderman

    My one told everyone that one of my children stole my money which I had filmed him trying to do he even told my family that it was all lies and didn't know where the lies were coming from unfortunately the flying monkeys believe him it makes me boil with anger

  • Sandy Moricle

    (From Virginia) it was New Year’s Eve …. and I found a narc grenade in my drafting desk. It must have been put there just before I moved out, because I hadn’t looked in that drawer since I moved. It has been over 5 months “ no contact” and I needed a charcoal pencil. It said “ I love you. Thanks for being a part of my life. I wish I had appreciated you more.”
    I froze…..I became pissed the hell off…. then I realized that although my life is literally at rock bottom , it is better without him. I am living on a couch, lost my job, and am looking for work…. BUT I’m not compromising to please anyone. I am finally finding myself. In doing so , I have found people who believe in me. That helps me so much and I am grateful that I am here. I have to thank him for being a dick ( although I won’t to his face) but I have learned valuable lessons. One is this…. if they are mirroring you, you are looking at the best part of YOU. Remember how awesome you are by that, then walk away and know that you are what they wanted to BE. And they will never achieve that. I smile inward knowing this, and it keeps me strong.

  • Arnel Evans

    I hate narcissists. I was discarded by my narcissist on December 22nd, 2018. I knew him since March 2016, and he was so sweet. I love him, and hate him at the same time. I'm glad to know who he truly is. If I ever saw him again, I would probably spit in his face. Thank God that he lives in Florida, and I live in Brooklyn NY.

  • MontanaSamieJo

    I'd like to schedule with you. Mostly because I value your thoughts and you are an outside person to my 'circle'. I need fresh feedback.

    I don't compute well. Could you put a link that I could follow to get on your calender?

    Thanks bunches 😍

  • Hermione Mars

    The narzi I dated denied our relationship at the end. He said it never really was a relationship (not even after 2. 5 years… and not even having told me that he wanted to build a home with me and introduced me to his parents). He called what we had an affair, an outlet. When I blocked him, he called my friends to tell them he was worried about me.

  • obi wan

    This dudes awesome and couldn't have said it any better. Love his channel. These channels helped heal me. I've suffered tbi and am a 16 year survivor of npd abuse. I suffer a brain injury. Thought I was crazy, because we didn't have npd abuse back in the day. In my day it was called being a coward and not standing up for yourself. Tax dollars could've been saved if I seen these videos and not a counselor.

  • Jewels Queen

    My ex narcissist has ghosted me for 4 months and he never even reached out for the holidays! NOTHING! Completely disappeared. I think it’s safe to say he will never bother me again! Never hovered me nothing! He is completely GONE! And honestly if I get a call that he’s DEAD I would be the happiest girl on earth

  • Jo Dumire

    The cruelty it requires to cause, watch, and enjoy the demise of another you have had a rrelationship with is beyond me. I've never experienced such Hell , I've not even seen a movie script with such an Evil Twist of a human. Bizzare. Gas lighting i thought i could keep up with him as i tied up lose ends before I left almost 2weeks ago…. Oh no i gave up. You portrayed one well with that smugness Thank you

  • thegreatalyssa

    I could tell he was getting ready to go (again). I'm glad not knowing the exact person(s) he's living off of now. He can't come back to me. He's disgusting to me now enough that I won't allow him near me, besides he's more than 1300 miles away after he took off this time. He texted me about 30 minutes after he left on foot. "I'm gone. I warned you about this." "You got some mental issues you have to deal with." Then nearly an hour and a half later he texted. "Goodbye" and "I'm gone." Of course, I did not respond to any of those texts. While at my friend's house visiting my phone was on her table and lit up and vibrated. He called 2 hours and 9 minutes after the last text. I didn't answer. I don't have voice mail on. It went down as a missed call. That was Dec. 6, 2018. Today it January 9, 2019, and he hasn't attempted any contact. His cousin told me the general area that he went back to (his home state). I really think he's done (95% sure). He ain't gettin' nothin'. I wouldn't touch him again and I don't want to see him or hear him etc. again. He's fvcked up and I'm done. He has mental illness with psychosis, drugs addictions, and narcissism. I'm 49 and he's 37 and I don't have any time to waste.

  • branbran0609

    I met my narc while I was grieving the death of my sibling and she was divorcing her husband. We had an instant bond even though I was never into dating a woman. She had been with women but had never dated them publicly. We agreed to try it but just let our closest friends know and both of us did not tell our parents ( we are in our early 30s) She then moved out of state for a job. She love bombed me throughout the entire 2 year relationship flowers, cards, gifts saying how beautiful I was and how lucky she was to have me and I put her back together after her husband left her. She would also say things to her friends " That girl is not thinking about me" when they would ask about me or she would call and say I know you don't really want to talk or I don't have to talk to you I have plenty of friends that want to talk to me. I told her I was still interested in guys but for now I was happy with her. She was upset when I didn't want to spend my birthday just with her but I wanted my friends to be there also. She would have mini temper tantrums but I would ignore her until she got over them. She was very supportive of everything I did and would try and help me and I would do the same thing for her she has very successful degree and always has to make six figures she has tons of friends and is very very charming and huge people pleaser. She wanted an birthday with just the two of us and I planned it I even had a custom made painting for her. She had surgery and wanted me to come and stay with her entire family and I said I would rather wait until she was back in her apartment when it would be just the two of us since there would be no space at her house and she had a lot of family. I sent care packages and talked to her everyday. We talked everyday on the phone video chat or social media. She would say I don't know why you don't come visit me more its not like you have a real job or all my other friends call and visit me more than you or you are perfect so that is why I feel bad when I complain. She lost her job and I went into overdrive helping her to find a new one in the city we both use to live in and got her resume to the person who was doing the hiring she later said that wasn't enough and I should have flown down to be with her. We went on vacation and had a good time and when we came back she started to get distant. I thought it was because of the job situation she invited me to come and visit her after she went out of town with her friends and I called her after she got back she normally calls to tell me when she landed and when she got home or what she was doing she didn't this time and I called to check on her, right out of the blue she was like I just want to be friends and I want to move on this was at 11:30 at night. I was shocked she just invited me to come visit. We talked the next morning and she said had been feeling this way since I didn't come to her surgery and that she had maxed out all of her credit cards to come see me ( I didn't know any of this she never told me) She said she wanted someone who would show more love and that she had been begging me to do it ( We never talked about it) She said that there was someone who would love like I wanted to be loved and she could find a person who loved her the way she deserved and needed to be loved but we would always be friends. I told her I told my parents about us and she didn't even seem to care she said because I still had interest in men that it wasn't fair to her and she was using me as a crutch and needed to get back into the dating world without me or her ex husband. I went NC and then my friend called me and told me to go to her IG page, she had blocked me and I was sent a screen shot of her kissing her new love!! A girl with both knew because she had introduced us they were friends . She would always mention this girl and tell me they were just friends and she was not even attracted to her, but now they were so in love! She blocked me and nobody else I called her and asked her why and she told me her friends told her to She said they were hanging out one day and she felt a spark between them so from September to November she was total in love She said she didn't know that it would morph so quickly into love and they both loved in the same way and were a great match. She was really cold and mean and I asked her what does this mean for us and she told me I never called or wanted to be with her and the only reason I came to visit her is because she had to bribe me to get me there and I never wanted to see her because I should have flown out visit her more and you walk through fire for people you love and that all my gifts I had given her didn't mean shit she had tried to lose weight for me (I didn't the doctor did and I was being supportive) and that she changed her hair for me. and that there was never even really a relationship. She said she always felt alone when she was with me because I didn't speak her love language and that she wanted someone to think about her the moment they woke up in the morning and talk to them the moment they got off work and fall asleep talking on the phone with her every night. She blamed me for not going out more even though I encouraged her to go have fun with her friends who lived there. She then said I know your never going to speak to me again and she understands she is sorry one day maybe we can be friends. Can we talk about this another day and hung up so dismissively. Then she texted me on my birthday I did not respond and have not heard from her since. I am confused because I didn't even know she felt this way she would just be passive aggressive and not really have a full convo about anything. Is this narcissistic behavior or I am to blame because didn't speak her love language?

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