A dad’s conundrum over his “sociopath” daughter’s dating life has been dubbed one of the most difficult dilemmas over posted to Reddit.
The father of a 25-year-old woman turned to popular Reddit thread ‘Am I the Asshole?’ to get the opinion of users over whether he reveal his daughter’s diagnosed condition to her loved-up boyfriend.
“I’ve been able to have a good relationship with my daughter and I enjoy my time with her, but there’s one thing about her that would give many people pause – she is a diagnosed sociopath,” the dad revealed.
He explained his daughter was diagnosed after she exhibited “odd, disturbing behaviour at a young age”, resulting in “a serious incident of abuse towards her younger sister”.
“Throughout her elementary years she struggled heavily, getting in lots of trouble in school for lying, cruelty and all other types of misbehaviours,” he revealed.
“She received an ASPD (Antisocial personality disorder) diagnosis at 18, and I had suspected it for long prior.”
The concerned dad wrote that his daughter is now a “charming, law-abiding adult” with many good friends and is very “adept at attracting guys”.
But she has told her father she “doesn’t feel empathy or love towards anyone, even family”.
He said after one of his daughter’s close friends had died, she said she felt “pretty neutral” about it, and confessed to him she was pretending to be sad at her funeral.
“While she acted very sad and broken up over the death of one of her closest friends at the funeral, she confessed to me privately that it was all a put-on,” he said.
“She has also stated she has never once felt guilty about anything she’s ever done, and doesn’t know what guilt feels like.”
Now his daughter has a boyfriend of about a year and a half “who’s crazy about her”, and whom the father has “a very strong relationship with”.
“We live in the same area and spend time together regularly,” the father wrote. “He is a great guy, very kind, funny and intelligent.
“Her boyfriend (who might propose soon) has no idea about her diagnosis, and she’s been very upfront with me that she has no plans to ever tell him, thinking it’ll scare him away.
“I’ve made it clear to her that she needs to tell him the truth before they marry; that he has the right to know and consider it; or I will; to which she always responds, ‘I know you wouldn’t dare’,” he added.
“I feel awful keeping this ‘secret’ from him, and letting him walk into a marriage without this piece of knowledge.”
The dad eventually asked – should he tell his daughter’s boyfriend about her diagnosis?
The post has racked up over 5000 comments, with many calling it one of the most difficult dilemmas they’d ever seen
“Wow. That’s the hardest AITA I’ve read in a long time.,” wrote one user. “You’re ethically compromised either way. It’s probably best you stay out of it.”
Another pointed out the possibility of it ruining both the father-daughter relationship and the romantic one.
“I think the guy needs to know, deserves to know, but what if it does destroy the relationship? I can’t imagine what it could mean for OP to have his sociopath daughter be very angry at him,” they said.
“Damn OP, I’m so sorry. NTA (not the asshole), but I don’t know if you should follow through with telling him or not.”
While one simple added:
“This is the craziest ‘Am I the Asshole’ I’ve ever read.”