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Narcissistic Parents – Can The Damage Be Repaired?



Those affected by a narcissistic parent or caretaker, struggle to develop into adults feeling whole, capable, emotionally solid and able to generate their own life healthily – because of not being able to establish their own values,  needs, voice or rights.

I know that many of you are also deeply concerned about what will happen to your children whose other parent is a narcissist – wondering it they will be able to survive the damage and ever emerge as healthy human beings.

In this video I take you into a deep dive that I hope can inspire you to understand that there are solutions and a way out of this mess and pain for every child who is enmeshed, or has suffered parenting with a narcissist.

It is my deepest wish if you have suffered abuse from a narcissistic parent or have children with a narcissist that you watch this very important episode.

Links mentioned in this video:

Article on my’ Life Between Lives’ session -https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/the-soul-contract-with-a-narcissist/

Life Between Lives – https://www.newtoninstitute.org/

How To Heal The Wounds From Narcissistic Mothers – https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-heal-the-wounds-from-narcissistic-mothers/

Narcissistic Fathers… Healing Yourself and Protecting Your Children – https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/narcissistic-fathers-healing-yourself-and-protecting-your-children-from-a-toxic-upbringing/

Join Us On The Blog And Read 100’s Of Free Articles:

https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/

FREE 16 Day Recovery Course:

https://melanietoniaevans.com/freestarterpackage

Learn How To Become A NARP Member:

https://melanietoniaevans.com/narp

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26 Comments

  • Hanna Fabian

    Thank you!
    No matter what words I would be able to put in here right now, I anyway will be not able to truly say how much your knowledge changed me, my life and the way I can now rise up my two sons!
    So as a usual woman unable to say it correctly, all I will say will be simple
    Thank you! ❤️

  • Britney Jolie

    This is so true! December 2016, I was broken in every possible way, I thought it was the end of the line, and the last straw was sending one of my children to the ex full time. I literally raised a hand to heaven and said, 'help me', and that was all I could do. A minute later I found Melanie googling toxic mothers on my phone. I worked NARP as well as Transforming Family of Origin Wounds (for my narc family of origin, especially mother.) Today, I look 20 years younger, every part of life is transformed, both my children are thriving and happy and I couldn't care less what my narc Mom (who could enter my mind, really, or terrorize me with a look or a thought) is doing. I feel so free, and the biggest despair, that of failing my children, is healed. I have done, (and continue to do daily) countless shifts for myself and proxies for my children. Still working on things inside and taking action outside to create my dreams, but it is incredible how far we have come. Wouldn't have even been able to imagine it. It is truly God's work as I notice people seem inspired by me too, and my children are doing well. So very very grateful.

  • Self-Love

    Melanie, years later, I reunited with my father. After doing NARP for 6 months, I was able to reach out to him. It’s been a journey and we are getting closer. There is more to heal.

    I’m so happy there is a possibility of doing healings through proxy, my father wouldn’t be able to do those himself because he speaks a different language.

    I really want him in my life. I didn’t hope for it, but I find happiness and new meaning in life thanks to him. And I’m happy I can see him through my own eyes again, the way I remember him from when I was a child.

    Thank you, Melanie. A lot of what happened in the past started to make sense.

    I’m tired though. While my life is getting better and better, there is more trauma coming up and I so want to be happy now, to be happy longer.

    I’m wondering how I could release pain and fear quickly, in between healings, while I’m at work, for example. Because by the time I come back home to do a healing, the trigger might be lost.

  • Gary Pfeifer

    congrats for your book, its so necessary to get this message out! I totally support going deeper into the real truth, I used to not believe but so many times I go far in the past using yours and others and my own built-in tools, I now cant see it in the old way. And this assures me you are still focused on telling the truth as you see it not getting carried away by popularity and fame. well done!

  • Lovely Lana

    Congratulations!!!🎆🎉🎊Well deserved!!!Thank you so much for your life changing work. I hope you reach number 1 in the world on every book list.👯Narcissism is a phenomenon. I live in Hollywood, California and it's NarcLand!!!🙀 And many of us have suffered in our childhood from Narc parents. (Myself included) Wisdom has helped me to navigate these personalities. Your work has taken me to another level. I will be purchasing your book soon. Lots of love.💖

  • Lea Lea

    Melanie a long message to you and your wonderful thriving community. You and Zak have unfortunately, albeit fortunately for others and the evolution of this world, been victims of this awful dilemma, that is running riot in our communities. As a child I would question everything, my siblings would follow the families dynamics, coping mechanisms that shaped their personalities, and became manipulators and blamed me, as this worked to keep the unit happy. The odd one was me. However, the odd one I notice in today's society is the one not choosing to accept what is, and questions or acts out that something is wrong. Unfortunately society shuns the behaviour, making the scape goat feel alienated and angry, depressed, and the "family" shake their heads, oh what they have to put up with. Yet they have all dumped their toxic waste, projection of their inner damage and lack of being responsible, onto a child/adult and blamed that same innocent waste unit. Zak is so blessed that you were so broken that you rose from the pieces of your shattered soul. If you hadn't I can't help feel that Zak would have been his step fathers other story, that you were not well and Zak had drug issues and how your ex is keeping it all together, and receive attention, be it from a few flying (chosen as they have influential nice ones) monkies that would repeat to others how wonderful he was coping with it all, your moods, illness, Zak's behaviour, addictions etc. Thank the heavens that you rescued YOU, then in turn assisted Zak. After all you two deserve all that life offers on your souls journey, working with your core and releasing trauma and thriving has worked. Such an inspiration to lifting the evil veil that some see as normal, some even enjoy the dynamics of their place in it all, and that is their choice. For those that cannot understand or question why? they like me can choose to face it full on, go to rick bottom and rise. What does not kill you dies make you stronger. I believe mental illness, suicides, may be related to a covert family dynamic that is so hard for authorities to understand. Once you live it, it is so sad, however, you can then see it everywhere. You cannot solve a problem with the same mind that has unconsciously created it. It starts with deep inner work, loss of family and friends that you no longer fit into their use of you, but a whole new, authentic, pleasurable real existence, attracting the same. The perpetrator will still be looking very liked and followed, but whoever is in their close control is going through it, at home or work they will chose who they abuse in their silent, manipulative ways. Thank you so much for assisting me on the most painful lessons in my life with now……good results appearing.👼🏻💕🙏

  • H S

    Hi Melanie, is is to late for my partners narcissist mother to reparent him and undo the damage? He is 31 and has now moved back in with her and she is trying to put things right herself. He has all the signs of npd. Thank you so much for all your help and advice. This relationship was hell

  • Pauline Burke

    Hi Mel 💚 My son has transformed from hating me and fearing his narcissistic father to maturing into a wonderful young man who loves and engages with me and we are going home for Christmas together! 😊What did I do? NARP NARP NARP! No pleading, begging or badmouthing. I got out of the marriage and managed to buy my own property and start my own business. It is a miracle. Of course it is work and we must face ALL our trauma and keep doing it, but parents please never give up! You can heal yourself and your family. So much love and gratitude to you Melanie and so happy about your book which is on my Christmas list! It's also my 50th Birthday so what better gift than to spend it with my son and my family. 💚💚💚

  • Diane Chester

    The ex narc in my life and I have 2 kids together. 2 and 4. My 4 yr old tells me he talks bad aboit me and he is teaching my children to curse and then messages me accusing me of this. Any suggestions other than having rules at my home?!

  • Rebel With A Cause

    Hi Mel. Question. Do you feel that it is more "palatable" for a victim/survivor to identify as a narcissistic abuse survivor than have to identify as a domestic violence victim/survivor? I find more victims and survivors are identifying this way. Perhaps they feel less shame, embarrassment by identifying this way? Thanks for all you do. I have been watching your videos for over three years.

  • Gatinha Bella

    I only realized recently that both my parents had narcissistic traits (one overt one covert). The overt narcissist died when I was 14 and the covert was my caretaker. He was not a cruel man but he was inappropriate with boundaries, emotionally vacant and immature, and did not allow any emotional expression in the household–he also made sure I could not become independent and self-sustaining, which set me up for several narcissist relationships throughout my life, including emotionally and physically abusive men (which was like my mother who was mentally ill and violent). I missed many opportunities in life due to this crippling effect (ptsd, depression, etc) that being raised by narcissists had on me, but I am grateful that I survived and have found joy and contentment in my life. I have been single over 10 years and I tried some dating but it seems the world is full of predators and I have decided that I want to stay single so I can stay sane and safe. For me Single=Sanity, Safety. Thank you for ThriverTV and your fantastic teaching on this ubiquitous and crippling societal plague called Narcissistic Personality Disorder (and all the Cluster B). Look forward to reading your book.

  • gill426

    Hm, I still believe you mean well and generally I do believe that healing by proxy has some amount of healing potential. But I don't find it okay to heal someone if they explicitly refuse healing. And all this shiny, happy "everybody feels amazing now, everyone is so prosperous and open and loving and healthy and 100% changed now" really is off-putting.
    I do believe in the process itself and I do believe great changes are possible. But this sounds a bit too exaggerated and too much change from black to white, it's not reassuring.

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