narcissist videos

Narcissistic Abuse and Gaslighting

Adult Children of Alcoholics often times attract partners who are very much like one of their dysfunctional parents. Even thought their partners might not drink, they may exhibit signs of passive aggressiveness, narcissism, manipulative personality traits and so on.

When we are friends with ACoA’s who are struggling with these types of relationships, we may wish to help them detach–pull away–set up boundaries–and to just stop engaging the narcissist. But very often, adult children of alcoholics do not have the mature coping skills needed to stop engaging the narcissists.

As a Life Coach, one of the primary struggles I come across in ACoA’s is their weak boundary structures. Because ACoA’s have been taught to disown their feelings, they never developed the proper boundaries they deserved to help them protect Self Psychologically, or Self Emotionally or Self Physically.

Like a damn with a wide tear in it–ACoA’s leak their energy through these damages/wounds and sadly attract emotional vampires who are more than willing to dance in the ACoA’s blood.

This video is for anyone struggling to help the ACoA who has not yet learned to hold onto her/himself, and who is still engaging in harming dialogue and relationships with others who are more than willing to gaslight them–and suck their emotional blood.

Lisa A. Romano is a Breakthrough Life Coach who specializes in helping people heal their childhood programming. If you have been raised by alcoholics, narcissists, or if you are struggling with codependency, and have been attracting narcissists into your life these videos will help you unravel the dysfunctional beliefs that are holding you back.

This channel speaks to those interested in “codependent counseling”, “codependent therapists”, “codependent no more”, question “What is codependency?”, “narcissistic abuse survivors”, “codependency issues”, and “codependent recovery”.

If you are interested in reading Lisa’s books they are;

The Road Back To Me
My Road Beyond The Codependent Divorce
Loving The Self Affirmations-Healing Unconscious Codependent Belief Systems
Quantum Tools To Help You Heal Your Life Now
Loving The Self Affirmations-Healing Childhood Brainwashing

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  • veruc w

    Beautiful things you've said :)) emotional set-point to attract certain kind of people; we attract what we are – the vibe; easy to engage with people and behaviors in which we have spent so much time before (like childhood, toxic relative..); pigs who like to wrestle in the mud – narcissists pull you into the mud :)) ahh so happy to hear that.. ; people who can identify those narcissistic traits in people and keep their feet on solid ground and never get into the mud with a narcissist – can't be abused (I have one person in my surrounding who successfully identified one narcissistic person, made his boundaries, and still is able to be around that person – its like he made a definition and agreement with his own self that being with that X person in prolonged amount of time is dysfunctional, and he will limit that time… – He is a SAINT for me cause I was never able to do that, to recognize that and able to say NO, limit the time or make a distance. He knows how not to step into the mud and he never read any book about narcissism or similar behaviors 🙂 and I've spent years and still don't have that skill.)
    This video was the right thing to start my day 🙂 Thanks a lot Lisa

  • Seagull B

    once we change our energy we will change who we attract into our life! 
    this is so true but to actually change this it is important to surround yourself with positive energy and a positive community. I recommend sivananda yoga which gives people tools which will ensure they feel a new vibration level .
    Thank you for your clear message. This is so important . You might not be the first to say these messages but your voice is very clear!!! 

  • Lisa Says

    I think we grow up with this amazing ability to roll with the punches, and because we couldn't reject anything and establish a standard for respectful treatment as kids, it never occurs to us that could be an option in adulthood. I think of it as a skill. To me, it's not that we just roll over and put up with unfair treatment; it's that were highly skilled at accepting and accommodating realities we don't like. It's important to remember it's not a two way street, though, and that if I operate my life that way, that's my choice. And choosing to live that way doesn't mean the person i accommodated will ever do the same for me. It doesn't mean they won't, but it's unlikely that they will.

  • Jennie Hughes

    Sometimes we need to disassociate from people even though they are not the abusive narc but simply because they inadvertently aid the narc ! Certainly not on purpose , but nonetheless , just as devastating ! A little bit stoned & drunk ! I'm just saying !!

  • Marcy Sanchez

    My partner/parasite …… Gaslights me and won't leave even if I tell him to and makes me feel guilty saying that I'm doing damage to him ……how can I get help I've been done since 2005 and till now and this coming 2016 he still here and won't leave and hardest part is that I have 3 kids which one (my oldest) is disabled he has cerebral palsy and because of him I can't function to my fullest I'm beyond destroyed inside me I'm dead alive police came and I told them I wanted him gone and all they did was put him out for the night …..not arrest ….they made him leave the house for one night and come back next day ….I really need help ….I really thought the police was going to help me but this parasite narcissist is very hard to get rid of I seriously don't know where to start. Please guide me on information on where to go to get help to get him to go away ….I've been with him since I was 15 and abused and beat by him physically and emotionally …. He don't hit now

  • Jehosheba Langley

    This is on a completely smaller scale–getting a movie is nowhere as important as picking up the kids from school. But when I was a teenager, my dad said he would rent a certain movie for me on my birthday when I had asked him to. When it came to my birthday, he acted like that hadn't happened. When I objected to watching what we had on hand because he had said he would get the new movie, he went out and bought the movie, which I immediately felt bad about because I knew new movies were expensive–I could have waited 'til the price went down to buy it. The whole thing left me feeling crazy like I was a spoiled brat, throwing a temper tantrum. But looking back, I realize I was not crazy to object to my dad breaking a promise and acting like it hadn't even happened. Was I?

  • Anna Dudzik

    Hi Lisa I have a question ? This whole idea of narcissist and codependency is very confusing to me I'm trying to figure out if am I a narcissist or codependent I have certain traits of both behaviors and patterns how the heck do I figure this out , there is so much information out there which is even more confusing since so many of these so called experts say a lot of different things so I don't even know who knows the real truth about these disorders . I need to find the right answer if you could give me some information I would really appreciate it . Thank you Lisa for your videos 🙂

  • Casper Insight

    Eye opening statement, soooo true!
    We attract the toxic, the Npd, alcoholics, addicts, because thats OUR emotional set point.

    How do we fine-tune our set point to attract healthy people?

    Lisa thank you for doing what you do! I find your insight and awareness bang on. I enjoy the way you speak your truths in a very relatable way. You are concise and easy to understand compared to another female Npd expert that I have a difficult time listening to. Keep on keeping on, as this info is golden!

  • teresa Klein

    Thank you!
    I've nearly drown trying to help my codependent Brother. No matter how much advice or therapy encouragement I've given him, I finally gave up. I told him that I can't worry about him anymore. He has to start caring about himself enough to recover and I cannot do it for him.

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