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How to Deal with the Smear Campaign Like a BOSS!



Everyone who has dealt with a narcissist wants to know, how do you deal with the smear campaign? What can you do about it? How do you vindicate yourself?

In this video you’re going to get 5 tips to deal with the smear campaign like a BOSS!

Meredith’s book THE JOURNEY: A Roadmap for Self-healing After Narcissistic Abuse — http://bit.ly/TheJourneyMM

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NOTE: Meredith Miller is not a therapist or counselor — She is a holistic integration coach, helping you to self-heal after abuse and transform your life. She works with a mind-body-spirit approach to wellness that is a valuable complement to traditional psychotherapy. She recommends that you also seek out a licensed therapist who has experience with narcissistic abuse and understands these dynamics extensively in order to help you with the Complex-PTSD, especially in the early stages of recovery. Thank you for taking responsibility for yourself!

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#smearcampaign #flyingmonkeys #narcissist

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39 Comments

  • Cooper McKenzie

    Narcs trying to get me sacked – im being mobbed , should i resign or fight? they are trying to destroy my reputation and medical license – cant move on without a reference from the narc boss which it wont give – feeling so helpless
    if you talk you are faced with discipline- not allowed to talk to anyone at work ?!

  • D Kirk

    Thanks! I am definitely being grilled and harassed thoroughly as a result of the smear campaign.

    The narcissist in my life went after everyone I know.

    The smear campaign sucks!!!!

    The best answer I have found so far and have realized is to stand up for one’s self and cut the cords to all those who simply refuse to see the truth clearly.

    I’m tired of over explaining my story just to find myself going in circles with people. If one does this, then one only re-traumatizes one’s self over and over.

    Best to find new friends and rebuild.

  • Alexander Gonzalez *

    (Can`t find your contact -mail or phone)
    Pay attention Meredith :
    From the El´s / Al`s -Creators & The Watchers.

    Help will come from these Universal & Galactic Locations -Galactic & Universal Hierarchies. To stop the BigGame on Earth(Urantia).

    Help will come. This is the Real Plan A.

    At Divine Timing Help will Come.
    Everything is Prepared.

    Sign: Alexander(Narayana)
    Question: Is time an illusion?

    Answer: Yes time is an illusion of sorts, we see what is projected to us in a solid 3D dimension but that is not how it is in 5D, in that dimension all possibilities are seen all at once.

    Question: What do you mean when you say that the first and second races created this universe?

    Answer: The EL's are the first races, they were the ones who used the sonic boom generator To create the Big Bang and seeded life on many of the planets in the known Universe. This race exists in 12D and higher dimensional worlds, it is highly telepathic, and has the ability to switch from being in a light body which is pure energy to taking on corporeal physical form which can take on various body types and facial characteristics.

    Question: But other universes, they are not the creator of those, then.. I mean, I'm trying to view this from the multiverse standpoint?

    Answer: Yes there are many versions of universes but there are two primary universes the known universe with pockets that branch out into other universes which are not cloaked and the unknown universe which houses beings 12D and up which is cloaked and protected by a force field so lesser density beings cannot enter that one universe.

    (Site of E.K.)

  • Alexander Gonzalez *

    HELP WILL COME FROM…
    Andronover (ahn' drah noh ver)

    The spiral nebula from which our local universe was born.

    (168,2)[15:3.6]

    Angona (ahn goh' nah)

    A massive stellar system whose passage near our sun helped create our solar system (see Monmatia).

    (465,6)[41:10.1]

    Ensa (en' sah)

    The name of the minor sector of the superuniverse of Orvonton to which our local universe, Nebadon, belongs (see Orvonton).

    (174,8)[15:7.8]

    Monmatia (mahn may' sheeah)

    The universe name for Urantia's solar system which was formed over four billion years ago (see Angona).

    (655,6)[57:5.1]

    Nebadon (neb' ah dahn)

    The name of our local universe, which is governed by our Creator Son, Michael, together with his Creative Mother Spirit consort. Salvington is the headquarters sphere.

    (1,5)[0:0.5]

    Norlatiadek (nor lah' tee ah dek)

    The constellation to which Urantia belongs. Constellations represent the 100 primary divisions of local universes and link the systems to local universe administration.

    (485,1)[43:0.1]

    Orvonton (or vahn' tahn)

    The seventh of the seven superuniverses which, in conjunction with the Paradise/Havona system, comprise the grand universe of time and space. Orvonton is divided into 10 major sectors, each of which is divided into 100 minor sectors. Each minor sector contains 1,000 local universes, each of which is comprised of 100 constellations. Each constellation is comprised of 100 local systems, each of which is comprised of a potential of 1,000 inhabited worlds. Urantia is the 606th of the 619 currently inhabited worlds in the system of Satania.

    (167,3)[15:2.12]

    Palonia (pah lohn' ee ah)

    The system in which Michael made his second bestowal, as a primary Lanonandek Son serving as System Sovereign.

    (1311,4)[119:2.5]

    Satania (sah tane' ee ah)

    The administrative system of approximately 1,000 inhabitable planets to which Urantia belongs; one of the 10,000 such systems in Nebadon. Jerusem is the capital sphere of the Satania (see Orvonton).

    (359,6)[32:2.9]

    Splandon (splan' dun)

    The name of the major sector of the superuniverse of Orvonton to which our local universe, Nebadon, belongs. Its capital sphere is called Umajor the fifth (see Orvonton).

    "It was scarcely a million years subsequent to this epoch [400 billion years ago] that Michael of Nebadon, a Creator Son of Paradise, selected this disintegrating Nebula [Andronover] as the site of his adventure in universe building.

    Almost immediately the architectural worlds of Salvington and the one hundred constellation headquarters groups of planets were begun.

    It required almost one million years to complete these clusters of specially created worlds.

    The local system headquarters planets were constructed over a period extending from that time to about Five Billion Years Ago." 57:3

    Proposition. The Paradise-Havona System constitutes the perfect and eternal nucleus of the Master Universe.

    “The Paradise-Havona System, the eternal universe encircling the eternal Isle, constitutes the perfect and eternal nucleus of the master universe; all seven of the superuniverses and all regions of outer space revolve in established orbits around the gigantic central aggregation of the Paradise satellites and the Havona spheres."
    *************************************************

  • Lilly Euphoria

    it hurts alot a " smear campaign especially when it happens after you ve gone , no contact , I ve noticed that when the abusive system is within family , they hide the truth to other people , people from the outside , they are ashamed of the truth and their awful mistakes , they dont wanna look ugly to strangers , they just find it easy to look horrible to close related members and find no guilt or self reproach for what they say , they dont have any kind of self responsibility for what they do or say and have no sense of self guilt or consideration for others …. thank you very important tips , I was hurt and I find strength and recovery from attachment from what you say …..

  • Saving Me

    I got invited to a wedding next month. My ex narc whole family will be there. He (narc) was not invited. My whole body tells me not to go but my husband and child (narcs daughter, no contact) really want to go. Should I go?

  • Ruth Jones

    I’ve just rewatched this video because I think it’s sooo good, and the expression you used “it takes two to tango” jumped out at me. I had a family flying monkey say this to me once because I had distanced myself from a seriously controlling and abusive close relative. My response was perfect👌 I said that I totally agreed with the statement that it takes two to tango because it takes a controller and a controllee (I just made that word up) to dance that kind of tango. I said that my distancing myself was just me not dancing 💃 this tango anymore. You should have seen the look on their face. They had no means of responding to this stance. Haha 😂

  • Cara Sachs

    This just happened today. I’ve been NC with my abusers (mother & sister, both Narcissists) since 2015. They abused me for 43 years. My sister has begun working on hoovering my brother and I, claiming my mother is basically on her deathbed (but that she’s going to continue driving until the end of the year). Major drama, manipulation, and guilt trips. Now my sister has begun sending emails to my brother (who has been the scapegoat his whole life) only, saying that I’m hateful and am slandering her and my mother. All I’m doing is telling the truth. Telling my story. Not protecting them and lying as I was required to do for 43 years. It is NOT slander if it’s TRUE!!!

  • Marybeth Cornell

    I'm really seeing the need to develop my story and narrative. My family (6 brothers/sisters) has been smear campaigning with impunity. I am not prepared for a response. I'm not clear enough to speak up and loathe another target practice. When my cousin passed away, they neglected to include me in the plans for his wake/funeral. They appeared the consoling family while I appeared AWOL and could care less. This bothers me still after months gone by. I don't know what to do in the future as my family is aging and information may not be given to me. I haven't gathered the nerve to speak to my poor Aunt to apologise for not being there for her when her son died. I'm so angry and at a terrible loss. What do I do the next time? How can I bypass their wall of control over family news? Again, I seriously hope it's possible to develop a narrative. I need to show my respects at family members' passing. I might have to accept that it may not be possible.

  • kamalalovely

    Hi Meredith! Your channel has been a literal life saver for me. Thank you so, so much for sharing your wisdom on narcissism. In some of your earlier videos, you have a bookcase behind you and I always find myself wondering what books you have. You have made several great recommendations and interviewed authors, but I wonder if you might consider making a video that concisely goes over the books you most recommend and why. Thanks for considering. 🙏🏼

  • Jane S

    These are the things I did. Get used to doing them. People in groups are always jockeying for position and status. You need to distance yourself from people who do these things – smear campaigns, undermining – sooner, never later.

  • AS Stanley

    True. I had a woman at work INTENT on isolating me socially and at the time I felt like I'd lost. I withdrew from the people who bought in to her view of herself as lovely and the ''narrative'' that I was paranoid and sensitive. I just carried on going to lunch /tea break on my own. Meanwhile, that woman couldn't even go on inhouse training without checking to see which of her buddies would be there too, to hold her hand. Luckily eventually she left and the moment she left I felt like I was back in the fold. I had confided in one man what was going on and he reacted by calling me paranoid and seemed to go out of his way to be friendlier to her! He also told her that I was upset at being excluded and a group of people sat around sighing with concern about my paranoia at being excluded! So I keep a huge distance from him even though he often asks me how are you ! I say ''fine thank you!'' He seems determined to win me over again but I cannot forget that he was a flying monkey. I hope this is not holding a grudge. I feel like it is protecting myself. I am living and learning.

  • monica Cruz

    Very useful, ringing a lot of bells. Following your tips will sort the wheat from the chaff, as has happened in my life. There are people that you would never imagine are toxic, suddenly come out of the woodwork. The smear campaign masquerading as concern…definitely a thing.
    Thank you Meredith

  • steve4344

    haha Listen to me I am God said actually it is aliens from another dimension said we have to join my new religion to unify the world or we have to eat shit. everyone. listen to me. I am on youtube steve4344. hurry we are burning daylight.

  • Rebecca

    Be able to identify when a narc is trying to recruit you as a flying monkey also. Resistance can put you on their radar so be aware. Remember, people who talk about other people to you will eventually talk about you to the new recruits and this weeks flying monkey can be next weeks target.

  • Ray, Philip

    I discovered . …in this life men and women are not identified as to their integrity and character by their work status…accomplishments…religious affiliation…service…great deeds…faith….all the greatness they promote BUT I discovered in my awakening that the true integrity and soul of a man is in the extent of efforts he will take in revenge on people. Look at the vengeance they actively seek with their void of empathy and the fact they never apologize but live a life of orchestral efforts in the control of their flying monkeys ….
    Void of conscience or authentic life but rather mirroring their supplies as they feed off anything authentic as they are envious empty souls by design…
    Their mission is to conquer and destroy what they envy and hide their truth as they live their lie

  • Patricia Clark

    WOW WOW AND WOWZA! Searched for podcast " WHEN YOU TELL THE TRUTH IN ABUSIVE SITUATIONS" podcast you referenced. Choose empaths rose colored glasses w/ 3 women talking…MY NEW COMMUNITY OF
    PEOPLE WHO do VALIDATE U, that u said we needed.
    Meredith you shined Like a beacon of light from a lighthouse on this podcast. YES SOURCE OF MY IDENTITY IS THE TRUTH. Identity is who God says we ARE! " I have pain but i am not pain" Redefine the word wounded.
    Broken to the point of not wanting to exist , the host or other visitor commented, i relate.
    The host said give yerself one month to heal for every week you were w a narcissist. i dont have that much time but its totally biblical how they surrounded you before you totally woke up to it all is what i see. Been healing piecemeal my whole life struggling against false perceptions and. wrong expectations ….being basically consumed. I wonder what number of homeless mentally ill or addicts were victims of malignant narcissist parent COUPLED with narcissist adult relationship? VERY HIGH I BET.
    I am sooo glad i came back to your channel as i was going with anyone with a" follower of Jesus approach " because that TRUTH N LOVE saved me. That relationship saved me.
    THE TRUTH OF THE VERY NARRATIVE of your life you spoke of owning is very impt. and why i think i've remained the same core person, only you and God alone know the intentions of your heart and what motivates those intentions. You may be a worrier or skeptical because of trauma so you warn others…. or you may be a worrier and skeptical in order to manipulate others with fear or criticism to harm. That is how similar the responses of non narcs and narcs are. To be lumped in wrongly with those who COME FROM A VERY DIFFERENT PLACE , deception vs. injury is not good.
    I think i will always wear the rose colored glasses of HOPE for others.
    Its only with our right responses to others that the terrain can exist for
    others to come to a closer deeper realization of truth for themselves.
    Meredith i thank you for continuing on your journey and allowing a deeper level of truth with no deception to come forth.
    The false identity labels these narcs spin around a victim like a spider, labeling your thoughts and intentions and motives and feelings to suit their web is psychological torture with gang stalking to the maximum degree but the twist is, the gang is deluded with false perceptions that their greed or intellect of pride will not allow them to recognize fully so there is a lot of dismissal of reality and relabeling falsely realities.
    Thank you so much.
    We can hop through these stages faster with the correct information .
    Too many falsehoods are being projected on the victims trying to heal .
    You speak of finding abundance the correct way, there are greater and lesser intentions but the goal should always be the Truth because love and acceptance is found there too!!!!!
    Grateful to joy for you.

  • Karen Kasteler

    I got your book and am reading it….how did you get SO CLEAR
    ..& SO STRONG. SO FAST….IT"S SO INSPIRING….I agree with everything you say…it's just sad that my adorable little boy turned out like his narcissist dad.

    .
    ..

  • hope46sf

    The reality of my n.
    ex h. being a habitual liar came to the forefront when he actually admitted to me what he told his family about my leaving. He did not bat an eye. I realized right away that NOTHING I could say to his family members would make them believe what really happened. So good to let it all go….I know who I am and the truth about our marriage. End of story!

  • RG Balleson

    Y'know, I really hope that a lot of this isn't from stuff said and done on social media. I deleted facebook and Instagram.. after years and years of feeling bad. No more anxiety, no more toxic comments that gather steam and cause relationship breakdowns. I don't think about smiley face/tear face, or what I'm going to post, or that I need a photo to share.. problem solved.

  • Pusum

    Interesting – i woke with the feeling "maybe they are right"? Amazingly seen your post than clicked – to hear a reality which i needed. Four years ago was in auto freak accident – received PCS at time was unaware – a person crawled in while my head was injured i trusted this person – slowly they tore me apart – why? – dollars missing/id taken/used my name to financial benefit as i healed found i would not be 100 percent – i stayed home a lot – slowly participated in social life with limits where ever i went there was a strange air/feeling and whispers. Honestly now sure what was said, but i am being judged on what? To think people could be that cold? or something said that pushed and discredited me – i did ask the person and show them power bill in my name at address not mine – that may have been the beginning of talk? Regardless – my life is too precious – i can't get a job due to injury – i garden and pray – i pray a lot – so can focus. I see more in life revealed in nature , however very lonely – I ask God why do they treat me this way – i just get message to keep going. My grandfather told me I am a good person – and good people are sometimes used as a springboard to weed out the bad people – i was told to forgive and watch also to love all and pray for others. I do and know the power of standing back is harder than giveing up — i wont give up but again – it is lonely and so hard sometimes to see others repeat lies – others that new you / or maybe did not – love to all – not a victim just awoke to crule people that use words of lie to cover their insecurities and taking what is not thees … Prayers to all – walking alone is better than walking witha FALSE FACE PERSON. The peace walk is brghjt and clean with birds singing and garden growing with love – as i wont get back at an;yone – the world is had enough of that – peace is best way.

  • Kitty Kat

    I just noticed you reached 200,000 subscribers. I am so happy for your success, Meredith! I hated "the concern" element. I have learned to despise that word because every time I heard it, it was about something negative for me. I could fight "the concern" but it never stopped. I was "crazy" and everyone "was concerned" about me!

  • Launa Banauna

    Thank you, you beautiful woman! I must admit that when I first learned of all of the awful things my husband said about me to our friends and our families, I was devastated that he would have done such a thing. At the time, I didn’t know about narcissism, and it’s horrible affects on people’s lives. Now, that I’m all caught up to speed, I am slowly regaining my personal power, and watching my narc husband turning into a shriveling flower.
    Thank you for your videos, they have saved my sanity, and my life. 💕

  • Our Little Big Beautiful Buckeye State Life

    For myself in dealing with my covert engulfing narcissistic toxic family unit (yes I know that title is long Lol but that's exactly what they are) I felt like the key was in the very beginning, as hard as it was to do, was to shut off all connections with any mutual contact that I felt like was easily manipulated by the narcissistic people in my life (which was basically everyone) there were only very few people who I felt like could actually see the abuse however if I choose to keep those people in my life I kept them very much at arms reach because I trusted no one. But the ones who are still around after my 3 yrs of nc with my toxic family are people who I spoke to about what was happening before my toxic mother and family had a chance to smear me to them. Once I spoke my truth whether they understood it at first or not after my toxic family members had a chance to smear me to them they were able to see it for themselves. Those who I had not spoke to about the truth of why I went no contact before my family got to them were pretty much a loss cause and I just discontinued all contact. Those who are in constant contact with my family I did not even try to explain because my toxic family unit is very well trained in manipulation and my truth would easily be ignored or used against me by what would be more convenient for that person to believe which would be my toxic family who make sure to constantly be in their face manipulating realities, I recognized that those people who choose to believe the narcissists are dangerous because they can be puppeted by the narc whether they know it or not. When letters texts phone calls and people come to my door I give no reaction at all for them to see. So there is absolutely nothing they can use except the lies they make up. I have a small daughter and even tho smear campaigns are hard and isolating protecting my child from that environment is worth it all. People are not going to completely understand what it's like to go no contact with a family like this and alot of times you can feel pressure to reunite with your abusive family. But stay strong and if you have children and can protect them from it DO IT! Its hard at times but my life is so much nicer, pretty much drama free, I have made great friends my marriage is amazing and my child is joyful, bubbley, and able to enjoy her childhood and allow her own personality to blossom and be who she truly is without being bullied and have her self esteem robbed from her, she's a humble child who is compassionate but yet has self worth as well. She doesn't have to battle with the same issues as I did and for that it makes No Contact so worth it, and the smear campaigns that still happen are something I'm willing to deal with to allow her to have that protection away from the negative influences and mental and emotional abuse that my toxic family cause.

  • Linda R.

    I’ve been watching your videos and learning a lot. Do therapists ever tell someone they ARE a narcissist? My husband and I are currently in the smear campaign with his family. But, I think with all the therapy the narc in our family has been told she has everything BUT this PD.

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