narcissist videos

Borderline Personality Disorder – What it feels like

UPDATE May 8, 2015:
Although I have not been replying to any comments, I have been reading all of them. Considering the huge stigma around BPD, I’m not surprised at the nasty comments on this video about people with BPD.
For those of you coming to this video to demonize people with BPD, I hope you realize how hypocritical and ignorant you are being. Don’t accuse us of thinking in black and white while painting everyone with BPD with the same brush. We are not all the same.

Whether you hate me (or love me) for this video, you don’t even know who I am. You have no idea what you are talking about when you accuse me of being an abusive, selfish bitch from this one video. Instead, go take a look in the mirror. Are you sure you are not the selfish, abusive one? To make it clear, BPD is not the same thing as “narcissistic, psychopathic, abusive disorder” (that’s not even a thing). Just because someone you know is abusive DOES NOT MEAN THEY HAVE BPD. Not all abusive people have BPD. Not all those with BPD are abusive.

“Some things are hard to write about. After something happens to you, you go to write it down, and either you over dramatize it, or underplay it, exaggerate the wrong parts or ignore the important ones. At any rate, you never write it quite the way you want to.” – Sylvia Plath

My blog:


Dedicated to everyone in my life and everyone who has been affected by BPD.

1st song: My Immortal – Evanescence
2nd song: My Darkest Hour – Scary Kids Scaring Kids
3rd song: Breathe Me – Sia



  • Chloe F

    This video practically describes me in whole. It's relieving to know that what you are thinking and how you feel is not uncommon and that there are other people who are going through exactly what you are going through- this has been unwrapped in this video x

  • Kitsune Martin

    Hi. This video helped me cope through some really rough times and to explain how I felt to others. It's now gone and I can't use it anymore. I'm finding this really hard. Any idea where I can find it again? I watched others but they jist weren't as accurate.

  • Galaxy Nova2000

    Im 16 ive felt this way for 3 years never told anyone in my family only friends i never got a doctor or anyone to say im suffering from this but when i looked into it i qualify for 8 out of 9 criteria ive taken numerous online tests. I understand its online and not accurate but they all say i do or most likely am suffering from this. I just, i cant go my whole life feeling like this…

  • Special K 30

    I can tell you I understand you. I'm 43 & have finally sought a Dx last yr. I remember the day a neighborhood friend was to meet me by my front tree to play. I had to be 10-12? She didn't come. In that moment I remember telling myself, I knew she wouldn't show. Everything makes sense now but it hurts like crazy.

  • Karina Mendes

    that… that was really brave i never tell to somebody my illness and i almost cry with the video im 15 and i habe BOD since idk all my life but my illness gets realy bad whe i turn 10 i think but now thanks to somethings .. i can control myself now well almost and when i see this i just idk i feel something but something stranger and thanks for that…

  • putrifiedpuppy disemboweledkitty

    bpd….. now what if i told you, you people have been given a hand full of shit? thats right. ever notice since 1980, all these subcategories stemming from mental illnesses? with a wide variety of symptoms that can almost relate to anybody at some point in there life? fluaxal is for you, if you feel slightly depressed all the time (who doesnt), have anxiety (every human does) or have been given bullshit medical advice by a trusted psychologist? then ask your doctor about fluaxal and he will write you an expensive prescription for whatever fake mental illness your doctor has diagnosed you with……

    look im not trying to start shit, but you all have been grossly misinformed by your doctors. they create these sub categories for mental illness too try to stem symptoms to even healthy people. yes some of you most like have a form of an attachment issue. would you rather be labeled as having an attachment issue, or something called bpd that is so broad it can be labelled on 7/10 people in some time in their life. you will never get better feeling sorry for yourself having an overabundance of emotions, popping expensive little pills from your doctor's office. it takes determination and self discipline. i have to go start class, im an assistant psychology professor at McGill.

  • Arthur Langille

    when your world doesn't make sense. to find something that makes sense of your world, means a lot. people really need to come with an operating manual. if I have to poke around in the dark, I'm going to make mistakes. when you treat someone exactly how you wish to be treated and it's wrong. well I need to know why.

  • Arthur Langille

    when your world doesn't make sense. to find something that makes sense of your world, means a lot. people really need to come with an operating manual. if I have to poke around in the dark, I'm going to make mistakes. when you treat someone exactly how you wish to be treated and it's wrong. well I need to know why.

  • 222RL

    I'm in a relationship with someone who has BPD, and I can see how tough it is for her. I'd do anything just to help and try to encourage her to find healthy ways of dealing with the emotional rollercoaster. It's affecting me too though.. I'm starting to slip back into depression and very much at times it is emotionally abusive. I love this person and see a future but at the same time it's so hard on me that I don't know…. I'm not as outgoing…I don't talk to or see my friends as much.I avoid situations because of the constant questioning. I know that I've helped her in a lot of ways and she's much better now than when we first met…I feel so torn that at times I don't know what to feel. I feel like I can't do anything right… but she says it's not me and that it's her, but then why does it feel like me?

  • Ed Alvey

    All these erratic and paranoid thoughts I experience and I'm in psychological pain 90% of the time. However I rarely let people know, I just suffer in silence or moan about shit that's more socially acceptable; can anyone else relate?

  • feee99

    To anyone with BPD, if you want to understand what it's like from the "non" perspective, go befriend another BPD person yourself and let me know how that goes. I
    know you're addicted to feeling unconditional love – and what better way
    to feel unconditionally loved than to push people away and see who
    forgives anyway – but you really need to understand that it's abusive.
    Try learning to appreciate EARNED love and respect. Have yourself a
    good "batting average" of nice behavior and avoid bad behavior. It's
    really that simple.

  • daniel smith

    i was thought to be psychotic paranoid schizophrenic but then i was finally diagnosed with BPD and finally someone could give me answers but noone could help me the local mental health team done what they could but im still here and theyre still scared to leave me alone but although i go through this whirlwind of emotions ever changing pain not even knowing or understanding myself and just wishing i would end not it hell i cnt even say it right thank you for trying

  • J Pierre

    I've been suffering without knowing I had BPD for 52 years. Last year they told me and it finally made sense. The broken heart of friends using me and then leaving me behind. The constant search for someone to give their all to me, like I did for them. There wasn't anyone. My paper heart was torn in two. I got angry at the slightest mishap with people. If they cancelled plans or were undependable I rejected them completely and blocked them from contacting me again. I've been with my partner for 18 yrs and he tries to understand. He's always been so supportive when I chase my dreams. But when others hurt me I blamed him. Now I know , it's not him, and I plan to spend the rest of our lives making it up to him. I have to love myself even if only my partner is the only other person on earth who gets me. His voice should count.

  • Luis Guillermo Pineda Rodas

    I identified one hundred percent with this video. Being diagnosed with a BPD is something that destroyed my life but at the same time helped me understand why I think and act as I do. Every day is a suffering to me since I was a kid and I am chronically sad and depressed while being also happy and enthusiastic about what the future beholds for us. I

    used to cry when I was young because I couldn't stand the thought of African children dying of hunger, now I still cry for that and many other reasons. Perhaps, you will call such a person a crazy person… but as a matter of fact we are, as the video explains "humans with chronic emotional pain similar to a person with third-degree-burns".

    The only thing that keeps me from trying to kill myself is the idea of me being helpful to someone specifically or for society as a whole.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts with all of us,

  • Angelina 89

    Not all borderlines are the same.. there are different levels of it so just because you meet one person with bpd who hurt you very badly maybe that person was really that extreme we can't read there mind.. please open your minds before we judge..

  • Banana Fanafoferry

    It’s scary how much I identify with this. I’m a storm chaser. Going after men who are unstable and chaotic and hoping they will give me love and affection. Of course it never works out that way. I see abandonment on the horizon and I will usually make a weird exit before they can….or I will make things really strange by letting my emotions take over and creating a rift.

    I don’t identify with the rage aspect, tho. I’ve been diagnosed as BPD and possible overlapping Bipolar, but I’m usually just inconsolably despondent when people cross me or disappoint. Like I can’t figure out why they don’t care or why they’re being assholes.

  • balto4

    Thank You I am literally crying. Was used by a much older man for sex only and confided in a few 'friends' how upset and how badly he hurt me and yet I still did not want to lose him. The one 'friend' went behind my back and told him everything and it felt like my life blew up in my face. Yet this 'man' that used me turned it around and told everyone I'm very manipulative and I was the one making up lies. This happened 4 months ago and I'm still not over the pain of lossing him even though logic would say its better for me. I cannot handle lossing people in my life but I keep on getting used over and over. BDP is hell no revenge could be worse

  • multum profecto impietatis

    "BPD is characterized by extreme sensitivity to their own emotions and
    the emotional impact of others actions to an extent nobody else could
    So obviously the best music to accompany a video that illustrates this
    is hamfisted melodramatic Linkin Park level bullshit

  • Instinct Agirlsbestfriend

    Dear I could just cry right now. It's so much easier to be alone. However I crave to be loved so bad.
    Love to all you sufferers. It so sux.
    Thanks lifeline. Gosh u r always there no matter what.
    God bless you.❤ helped me keep it secret n under control. Let me let out my pain without judgement. I felt understood n validated n I learnt much.
    For putting up with me. Helped me raise my beautiful son with some dignity. Ever grateful.

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