narcissist videos

10 Signs of a Husband with Narcissistic Traits



This video answers the question: What are the signs of a husband who has narcissistic traits?

1. Infidelity/Fantasy
2. Wanting to control his wife’s appearance
3. Emotional needs are not attended to
4. Encourages children to disrespect wife
5. When choosing activities to do together, the husband only wants to engage in activities that are enjoyable for him
6. Extreme jealously of other men
7. Envious of wife’s success
8. Doesn’t listen, but expects a lot of attention and perfect memory
9. Downplays the contribution of raising children or taking care of the household
10. Views the wife as a support person dedicated to him

Narcissism:

There are two types of narcissism: With grandiose narcissism we see characteristics like being extroverted, socially bold, self-confident, having a superficial charm, being resistant to criticism, and being callous and unemotional. Vulnerable narcissism is characterized by shame, anger, aggression, hypersensitivity, a tendency to be introverted, defensive, avoidant, anxious, depressed, socially awkward, and shy.

Shoshani, M., Shoshani, B., Kella, R., & Becker, M. (2012). Green eyes, crows, and scorpions: Envy in the contexts of neediness, separateness, and narcissism. Psychoanalytic Psychology, 29(4), 440–458.

Krizan Z, & Johar O. (2012). Envy divides the two faces of narcissism. Journal of Personality, 80(5), 1415–1451.

Dubuis-Stadelmann, E., Fenton, B. T., Ferrero, F., & Preisig, M. (2001). Spousal similarity for temperament, personality, and psychiatric symptomology. Personality and Individual Differences,30, 1095–1112.

KARDUM, I., HUDEK, K. J., SCHMITT, D. P., & COVIC, M. (2017). Assortative mating for Dark Triad: Evidence of positive, initial, and active assortment. Personal Relationships, 24(1), 75–83.

Botwin, M. D., Buss, D. M., & Shackelford, T. K. (1997). Personality and mate preferences: Five factors in mate selection and marital satisfaction. Journal of Personality,65, 107–136.

Savard, C., Sabourin, S., & Lussier, Y. (2011). Correlates of psychopathic personality traits in community couples. Personality and Mental Health,5, 186–199.

Nodar, M. martha. a. nodar@live. mercer. ed. (2012). Impact of Family Dynamics on Narcissism and Impotence: A Commentary and Implications for Psychodynamic Counselors. Professional Counselor, 2(3), 201–207.

Support Dr. Grande on Patreon:
https://www.patreon.com/drgrande

source

35 Comments

  • BONBON

    I meant such a guy years ago and we were online and on the telephone and after two years we decided to meet and when I went to his place it was filthy it was run down it was disgusting and when I was there in his suite separate from his place because there was no sexual reactions going on between us we just wanted to find out if we liked each other and after a week I couldn't stand him he was so obnoxious rude controlling if I wanted to do something it was out of the question and he would say as long as you're in this house you do as I tell you to do or if we were driving down the road and I put headphones on because I wanted to listen to a certain song he told me to get out of the car or he was going to throw me out of the car and I asked him why it's because he thought I was being rude he was a nutcase he wasn't even the person I'm new on the telephone or on the Internet he was the complete opposite I had to fly all the way back to Canada from Ellie and it was so disheartening. It was almost like they couldn't understand was he bipolar was he schizophrenia and it wasn't until I went on the internet during my stay there to find out what the heck was wrong with him that I found out that he was narcisstic and after studying about this illness I discovered he was just that.
    I'm serious I think this guy had a lot of mental issues he told me that his father was very abusive to him and was an alcoholic and the funny thing is if you mention anything that he was doing for example he was washing something in the washing machine and I noticed he was mixing the wrong colours together and I kind of brought that to his attention then he blows up at me and says that he knew what he was doing and that I was being a b** and I was to go home back to Canada I mean this was hell from me.
    I spent two years of my life on the internet daily email after email phone call after phone call and only to meet him at the airport when he picked me up it was a rundown rusty old vehicle his house was dilapidated and he walked around in his pyjamas and housecoat all day and when he told me on the phone that he was going to take me to a lot of nice places and now they I had to do it myself I rented out car from Hertz and I did everything that I wanted to do whale watching and I went and seen all the sites that he refused to take me to because he thought it was not appropriate match for him good God I was had to be nuts to fall for him I'm glad there was no sex involved and even though I left after about a week I was happy to leave it was an experience that I'll never forget and I do learn something from it even though it was a disaster there was a lot of good things in it because of the knowledge I gained about him about narcissism and about codependency and about myself and my childhood so I'm sad to say that he's like that

  • BONBON

    I was raised with a excellent Father Who provided well and we're working many hours a day so I didn't see him too much my mother was very distance and cold and I never got hugs from her and after both parents died I used to reach out to the wrong type of people and it took me over 30 years to realize that you have to love the inner child of yourself you can't find love from other people and unfortunately co-dependents gravitate to narcissistic personality I'm The Giver I'm the type of person that will go out of my way to make other people happy and usually it's the narcissistic personality that I was really attracted to and over the last two years I've caught on so much and what I've been doing and I've been correcting myself I've been saying no to certain individuals and I've actually talked back to some people that were narcissistic in route to me where I wouldn't have done that 2 years ago. For example I met a narcissist and she said to me I don't like your opinion and I said to her while your opinion don't count to me so don't talk to me and she was just so out of it because somebody told me nobody talks to her like that and I said well she just had somebody talk to her like that and she's narcissistic so it works male and female. I've learned a lot and I read a book years ago and it's called your inner child of your pass. It's a real old book from the 70s or 80s but there are at least 12 different personalities that comes out in this book and it talks about you being one of them and there's a test at the beginning of each chapter that determines if you are part of that personality and sure enough you'll find yourself in that one chapter. It's a very good read book and I think you can get it on Amazon.

  • Kim T

    He's nailed this; my husband now ex is that way. Especially after I was pregnant, and the activities we did. He was very nonchalant with my family, but his parents and what he wants is always what his concern was. I need to put our child in Montessori because that's what HIS Mom wants (not caring what I wanted as the MOTHER). We watched tons of Nascar because that's what he liked to watch. You always feeI like you have to keep "him" happy. PLus, he had control over the money. For example, he'd give a grandiose tip to the waitress at a restaurant and then at home try to get the money back by nit-picking the grocery bill when I would go gocery shopping.

  • Sallye Mouk

    You nailed my husband to a tee. The last part about sex was the only off part for us. He can't bring himself to have sex with me because he no longer finds me attractive, his exact words. And he says I'm too fluffy. But he would be perfectly fine with me living him oral sex on demand. My response- hell no.

  • Audra Richardson

    My ex husband 101 course. You are the 1st person to nails his traits down to the letter. I felt as if you werr talking about our long term , then matriage that wnet south. My career advise, to how we raised the kids all charged when I decided to buy a house. This story is beyond detailed and would talk about this a lt a later dated.
    Stepping out on faith is what I did, now I'm homeless and starting all over again. Meanwhile, his constantly trying to know my every move even after the fact of his decision to divocre me.

  • do not disturb

    don't care about emotional needs of others… It's all about themselves….when you are mentally disturbed …totally exhausted… Even in that time they are thinking about sex..you are forced to listen some third class sensuous songs when you were searching for effection…and if you are hurt… and you protest than you are the villain.. … For them life is like a Hindi cinema where hero abuses the heroine….humiliate publicly but still at the end of the day she falls for him ……they can expect romance even when you are mentally drained..hopeless people

  • Gypsy Path

    Can you do a video about the difference between PTSD/cPTSD and covert narcissism? I have the former and don’t want the latter, but the traits you mentioned at the beginning sound a lot like the experience of cPTSD.

  • Veronica Marks

    So glad my partner does not even have 1 of these traits. Nearly 9 years on and he adores me, helps me, treats me, loves me, puts my wants and needs first and says he will do that forever. He cares for me when I have anxiety attacks, is proud to be my man, there is soo much more I can say… 💏

  • Kathleen Brokaw

    My now ex husband was very abusive to me and he has narcissistic traits. He was diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder by a psychologist where he is incarcerated. He went to prison for the abuse he inflicted on me in 2001. He will be out in 2021.

  • jess lazz

    Another video: why it is so difficult to leave such a husband.
    Like: you have to really not show at all you are leaving, cero evidence.
    Have to make networking, wich is very, very difficult, because a narcissistic will smell everything .
    Have to plan to go if it is possible, to another town.
    Have to just do it.

  • Aash films

    It's a big sad reality.. Narsistic treats his wife like victim. It's very difficult to handle.. I can agree with you. M trying to change his behaviour but not yet possible.. Is this painful situations for life time?

  • R. Schmidt

    I was married to one for 17 years. Most days I walked on eggshells. Never knew when his mood would change. He didn't like when I did anything for my kids. But I would do the same thing for him and it was alright. Had alot of friends when we met, but as time went by he was very unsociable with them so eventually they quit coming over. Just so it would keep peace with me. Hard to communicate with. When he would hurt my feelings and I would cry he would ask what I was crying for. Glad I'm not with him anymore.

  • Janice Smith

    ogh so true my husband had stressful jobs everything had to be his way.. Also he didn;t value me being at home with a handicapped child who was a heart baby.. He also was unfaithful on a business trip.. I knew the minute I picked him up off the plane he had been overseas. I went back to education and passed in four subjects and he never said a word of congratulations. He didn;t believe in christmas or birthdays his mother was the same. His brother and sister are twins and they are the same one of them partner shot himself. The other one lives in misery.. My husband died I had to look after him bedridden with prostate and bone cancer and it was dam hard as he was hard to please on all counts. I had a friend whose husband cut up her bras if she didn;t ask him first if he liked them. He also played around on her. Her baby was born with bruises on her the dr was horrified. She lost three babies because of his mistreatment of her.. he died the same way as my husband prostate cancer. I have been learning more about narcissism as the years go by and many women are living with this odd behaviour high ego and low self esteem I came to the conclusion and bad upbringing by mothers who didn't know any better.

Leave a Reply